Agree to Disagree….Do You Agree?

12 Jun

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Many friendly discussions end when someone says, “lets agree to disagree”.

I find that in my personal life, this phrase is only exchanged during discussions between me and people who I am not very close to. Usually my friends and I will “duke” out the topic until we understand where each other are coming from, without having to agree in order to end the discussion.

I guess this means we “agree to disagree”, but rarely do we pull this card to avoid hearing what the other has to say.

I think that’s what irks me about the statement. I often hear it used in a checkmate fashion. “Agree to disagree” can be another sign of the decreasing resiliency that I believe is infecting our communities.

When is it okay to “agree to disagree”?

–         When the person you are talking to has a very personal attachment or experience with the topic that sparks tears or anger

–         When you realize you do not have enough facts or valid information to continue “pushing” your point of view

–         When disrespect or insults begin

Overall, I think it is healthy to have thorough discussions with mature people. Although you may not agree with the logic and reasoning of another person, understanding where that individual is coming from, may actually help you find a solution to the topic at hand.

Below is a link that provides suggestions on how to “agree to disagree”.


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2 responses to “Agree to Disagree….Do You Agree?

  1. Qalil Little

    June 13, 2011 at 10:20 am

    Well, if you find yourself in discussion with someone you do not really know, I think it is very okay to do the whole agree to disagree thing. Sometimes you have to know the personality of the person with whom you are discussing in order to understand why they are taking the particular stance they take on an issue of great importance.

    Isn’t that what happens online a lot?

    • Ashley S.C. Walls

      December 20, 2011 at 7:40 pm

      Good point Qalil! Knowing the personality of a person is half the battle of a discussion.


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