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STILL

Jaded vision of the past

My soul is in shock

No longer remembers the words,

The exact sentences

The exact look on your face when the words were said

What is left are the feelings that lingered from those moments

The habits that formed from those moments

The pain that remains has situated itself inside of me

Turning sour

Little girl sits in the dark

Crying

STILL crying

Ultimately dying

For some the pain leaves,

For me it morphed

Morphed into sweet words and helping hands

Open heart and the ability to understand ALL

But myself

Not realizing that I never really dealt with my own pain

I try to help others prevent from doing the same

Tears streamlined

Little girl embarking upon a journey of her own

Something is wrong

She’s aware but cannot articulate

STILL cannot make the pain go away

Writes about it.Talks about it.

The feelings overwhelm

Silently she suffers

Brightly she smiles

Secrets

Confusion

MUCH confusion

When will the truth taste the dawn?

She is a pawn

An experiment

Mommy won’t come to grips with reality

Can’t look in the mirror and seek the change it needs to be

Holding herself,

little girl cries

Little girl dies

Lost in lust and rhyme

Little girl was a bonafide dime

One could not envision the pain

Bloodline contaminated, blood is bleeding……STAINED

Spreading, 

Like HIV

Who in their right mind would think to love me?

That’s how it feels when you have to fight for it

When you have to bite for it

When you did not know you had rights for it

Not personal she tells her self

“They are the ones that really need the help”

Friends cannot rescue they can only listen

Increased pain

Drought of rain

NEVER will it

go      a    way

But now,

I have to face me

STILL that little girl in the mirror I see

WHY?

WHY won’t she go away?

WHY won’t the pain leave?

Why does it keep playing hide and go seek?

Times that I wanted to die,

Sitting in the empty bath tub,

I cried

I called HIS name

I sat still

I listened

I opened up my heart so that my life would not end

I called on a friend

God told me my purpose

To be a woman of the truth

To write, to see, to speak

All of this to make whole of me

Copyrighted by Ashley S.C. Walls 2007

 
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Posted by on August 31, 2011 in Poetry, Uncategorized

 

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Success Formula: Titi Lo’Kei

Success Formula: Titi Lo’Kei

Statement from a Facebook user: “Damn. Should female rappers just give it up?! Seems like in Hip-Hop women are seen and not heard UNLESS they’re tooting their half-naked ass on stage singing/rapping.”

I am perplexed about the images of women in the media for years now. As I read the Facebook users statement, I immediately thought about Titi Lo’Kei, a young female rapper on the rise. With the release of her first video and international song “Buss My Brain”, I wanted to know how she was personally developing to avoid becoming a negative statistic in the music industry.

During our interview I was able to find out more about the life practices that are sure to keep Lo’Kei grounded and giving. I had an amazing aha moment. Artists, particularly women artists, need to dream bigger than the centralized images that inundate us on cable television. It is our individual responsibility to become familiar with cultures and entertainment other than what we see on 106 and Park or MTV.

Lo’Kei is an African-American rap artists with Nigerian roots, and a hit single in rotation in countries including Dubai, Nigeria, and the States. In order to be a better musician, Lo’Kei brushes up on the history of music genres and writes new music daily. The awareness of women musicians is sure to help Lo’Kei become comfortable with HER image. With aims on international success, she cannot afford to ONLY replicate the images of female rappers found in the United States.

There are a few things that Lo’Kei is certain about as it relates to her music career, “I don’t want to fall into the norm. I want to set myself apart from the image of current female rappers.” The music industry is fast paced. There is no sample start-up budget and blue print for upcoming artists to turn to. On any given day, a new opportunity can arise that requires Lo’Kei to adjust her plans, including her finances. She admits to not being great at budgeting, but when beginning a new project, Lo’Kei always looks to her resources and personal connections to get the best deals. Once she sets her mind on achieving the next step, she then begins to save and plan accordingly.

Most productive in her car, Lo’Kei writes some of her best lyrics in her mobile office, getting most of her business done on the move. Although committed to music, her most important life priority is building her relationship with God. Her attendance in church has wavered over the past few years, but Lo’Kei has refocused her priorities and re-ignited her commitment to God by attending church weekly, and trusting Him to guide her music career.

Lo’Kei says that church is a community asset in which others should turn to more often. Churches provide resources and outreach services including tutoring, donations, arts, and many other programs. Lo’Kei is certain that God led her to music. Early on, she was unsure about the role she is to play in the industry. It is becoming clear that she is to “lead by example, and be somebody that girls can look up to.” Lo’Kei also wants to “give advice to female music artist that allows them to avoid the pit falls that many women musicians before us have had to experience.”

With Titi Lo’Kei, a lot is at stake for not only her, but for women all over the world. Some artists and athletes make it clear that they do not want to be considered a role model. Although there is on-going discussion about whether or not this is acceptable, Lo’Kei has accepted the responsibility to use her growing fame to become a role model for female artists. It is because of this, that Titi Lo’Kei is a Success Formula for personal and community development.

Titi Lo’Kei’s Success Formula = Live the example + Active church involvement + International aspirations

More on Lo’Kei

What is your idea of community development?

Mentoring. Leadership. Being the example. Often people help, but they don’t live it.

What does success look like for you?

Bridging the Gap. As I travel to other countries, I noticed that people were listening to a variety of musicians, not just those in their city, state, or country. I want to play a part in bridging the gap for artists’ exposure everywhere.

S.M.A.R.T. Goals

– Attend church every Sunday

– Read the bible and pray EVERY morning and evening

– During the next year, improve my finances and savings with a focus on financial freedom

Contact

Lokeimusic@gmail.com

312-94-Lokei

www.iLoKei.com

www.youtube.com/titilokei

Update 7.12.11- From Titi Lo’Kei

  1. I still attend church every Sunday and I am also reading the bible more everyday.
  2. I pray all day everyday but i am still forming a habit of reading the bible every morning and evening. I have picked up on reading the bible but I am not yet at the point where I want to be. But as long as i am making progress I am happy.
  3. The one thing I keep going back to is budget. I remember saying I never set budgets because music expenses can be so random and unpredicted but that answer actually bothered me. Since then I have been studying ways to budget and save money in order to plan for unexpected expenses. I have also been finding ways to make extra money and seek out investors that are interested in sponsoring my music career. I often times live too much in the present instead of thinking long-term when it comes to money, but all of that is slowly changing for the better.
 

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Success Formula: Percy Ollie Jr.

Success Formula: Percy Ollie Jr.

His tweets, his Facebook statuses, and our interview, confirmed my assumptions; Percy Ollie Jr., better known as PJ, ALWAYS puts God first.

I am intrigued by PJ as a Success Formula because he radiates positive energy and kindness. Everyone that I know likes PJ. They enjoy his humble personality, subtle humor, and that he ALWAYS has a camera ready to capture once in a lifetime moments.

Photography is about more than taking pictures for the young entrepreneur; it allows PJ to give back to his community. As a photographer, PJ captures every day people’s lives while being able to shoot a variety of community events that focus on children and family.

With a formal degree in finance, PJ works with others to help them financially as they strive to achieve their life goals. He is a board member of the Young Men’s Educational Network and makes it a priority to actively participate in programs that give back to youth. PJ’s idea of community development involves personal growth that allows one to add to, and “encourage the younger generation”.

As a young person, PJ’s community invested in him. PJ first learned about life planning in 7th grade while attending the Christian camp, Kids Across America (KAA). It was at KAA that PJ was nominated to become a member of the “Im Third” program.The founding principles of the “I’m Third” program were- God first, others second, and I’m third. PJ’s life plans focus on these principles and he reviews his written life plans annually, revising his one-year, three-year, and five-year plans to enhance the success and challenges of the previous.

Although exposed to life planning early on, PJ admits to becoming more serious about the action planning of his goals during junior year of college, when his parents reminded him that his lifeline to their financial pockets would soon end. PJ says, “I started envisioning myself in the places I wanted to be and started to surround myself with people that were doing what I wanted to do. It really got real once I stopped getting help from my parents.”

On a weekly basis, PJ’s website is filled with new and timeless photographs. He is definitely one of the hardest working people I know. Working towards his goals from last year, he has successfully found ways to decrease his time with clients by delivering more quality products on the front-end, having to make fewer adjustments later. PJ is strategically planning for the growth of his business, Ollie Photography, by growing and mentoring a team of photographers.

During our interview I was able to find out about the work practices and habits that are leading to his increased notoriety. When asked about overcoming procrastination, PJ proudly responded, “I have 17 nieces and nephews. They watch everything I do. I cannot fail. I have too many people depending on me. The little ones are always looking for me to be the example. A lot of my nieces and nephews do not have father figures so I fulfill this role. They will ask me questions if they see me slacking. I do not have the option of failing.”

Reading the bible every morning is part of his daily routine. PJ also strives to live a balanced life by exercising three or more times a week and eating healthy meals as well as talking to family/friends regularly. He also feels that is it crucial to have a companion or loved one to provide regular feedback on the progress and outcomes of your goals.

When I asked PJ what was his greatest asset, he said “My belief in God. I don’t think anything reaches close to that. I believe that from having a personal relationship with God I have been able to make good on my talents and the relationships I have been able to establish. My commitment to this belief is my greatest asset.”

I most admire PJ’s respect for relationships. He ALWAYS interacts with people in a congenial fashion, thus leading to unprecedented success by word of mouth.

Percy Ollie Jr.’s Success Formula = God first + Relationship building + Acceptance of responsibility to his family

More on Percy Ollie Jr. (PJ)

What is in your life preparedness kit?

  • Cell phone, because my bible and my devotionals are on my cell phone as well as the internet, my calendar, and email (which is basically how I manage my business); multiple cameras.

Do you have any regrets?

  • NONE. I really think everything is a learning lesson. Prepare for whatever it is you want to do in life. Always be prepared.

S.M.A.R.T. goals

  • Read the bible in 365 days beginning Sunday May 8th 2011- May 8th 2012
  • Add 1 new photographer and an intern to photography team by the end of 2011
  • Launch new website by the close of 2011

Contact Information

Percy Ollie, Jr. of Ollie Photography, Inc www.olliephotography.com

Update 7.11.11- From Percy Ollie Jr.

  1. I’m delayed on my SMART goal of completing my bible in 365 day. I am currently only on day 7 so, I’m about 2-3 weeks behind. The good news I’ve done the hardest part of getting started and I plan on picking up momentum to get caught up. Additionally, I’ve began 2 other devotionals that are assisting with my understanding.
  2. Still in search of additional photographer
  3. I have 1 intern secured and in the process of allocating responsibilities
    Additionally, I have 2 other potential candidates
  4. I last worked on the content for my new webpage about 2 weeks ago so, I haven’t been as progressive as I would like to be in order to reach my goal. This week I will be creating a new plan to track my progress so, that I’m able to stay ahead of schedule.
 

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